Rambo’s Picks – Week of August 1

6 Aug


Translated by Vivian Kelly

This week, I had VK try-out a bunch of mascaras. It took a while because I napped more than usual in this heat and didn’t get around to dictating my beauty tip until the weekend.

I was inspired by ROCKY – the terrifying raccoon who steals into my garage at night. I got up the courage last Saturday night to spy on him from a hidden accessway into the vegetable cellar that has a good view of the food bag target in the garage.

Talk about a mess, but he inspired me! Rocky has mascara running all around his eyes – reminds me of those heavy metal bands on VH-1 when they do that “blast to the past” stuff. Hardly anyone can wear this look. He is a fashion “don’t”. I liked how Amy Winehouse looked, but was the only one.

THIS, is how mascara should look like on.

Anyhow, my advice is: Mascara needs to do a couple of things:

1. Lengthen

2. Thicken

3. NOT run or smudge till you take it off.

4. Oh – not look overdone. If you look like you’re trying to hard, that’s “a fail”!

After weeks of having VK test these out while out on long sweaty jogs in 90+ degree heat, I have a 3-way tie.

I know, I know, I’m only supposed to pick ONE, but they were all good and have different price points.


Hey Rocky, are you listening???

Expensive: Dolce & Gabbana

We bought this because we liked the shiny gold case that kinda looks like a piece of jewelry. It’s $29

Medium: Sephora Atomic Volume Mascara, $15 – does the job, seriously lengthens without smudging.

Auntie Theadora got this for us!

Also Medium: Mary Kay Lash Love Mascara – I like the sound of it, $15

We liked the flexible brush that makes even those wimpy little lashes in the inside and outer corners look long like Mr. Ollie’s whiskas.

Another good thing is that if you buy this one, you can buy the good stuff for me – Fancy Feast! Did you know that they were the lead sponsor on TV for that Royal Wedding?

Next Week, I try to help VK find magic in a jar – a little bit of the fountain of youth at the beauty counter. My big Sis, AVON, inspired me.

She is forever young, beautiful, and mysterious.


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